Just a Quick Glimpse at My Day

The kids had picture day at their school and so we got them all dolled up and took them to their little nursery school. We ended up at the end of the line and it took forever. So when it came to my turn, Lucy started crying and Asher started pulling ALL of the berries of the prop sled. It was only slightly amazing that they made it out of their alive. I actually threatened a spanking to Asher in front of the school's director. That's classy.

Since we were all dressed up and in terrible moods, what does that call for? Going and sitting on the lap of the scariest man in the world of course! I got EXACTLY the picture I was looking for. Lucy is screaming crying and Asher looks like he has the fear of God and Mommy on his face. In reality, I had just given him his first ever Cinnamon Tic Tac and he was trying to figure out a way to slap that taste out of his mouth.

Doesn't it make you want to visit us during the holiday season?

The Real Thing

I just saw this on the back of my Diet Coke 12-pack:

"Refreshing. Uplifting. Hydrating?

It's true. Research shows that all beverages contribute to proper hydration. That means whether it's your first can of the day or your afternoon pick-me-up, Diet Coke helps you stay hydrated all day long. So stick with the Diet Coke taste that you love. Your body will thank you for it."

Your body will thank you for it. Really? Is that what it is doing? Seriously, cut it out Coke. As much as I LOVE Diet Coke, this is an ad ploy that goes WAY TO FAR. And just to let you know, I feel exactly the same after I drink three Diet Cokes as I do when I drink water. Except that I can clean my carpets, paint the house and do amazing zig-zag drawings all in under half an hour because three Diet Cokes=speed in my body and makes it so I can't settle down the entire day.

But, I mean-at least I am hydrated right?

So Do You Think...

that my daughter has News Anchor Hair?

My sentiments exactly

I just saw this on Mama Pop.com and it mirrors my thoughts on the holiday season perfectly:

Poo. The Gift That Keeps On Giving...

So, the Christmas buy, buy, BUYing frenzy has started with a vengeance. I always get a bit of a thrill when the first decorations go up and the spirit of Christmas future is still soft-focused and filled with hope. This is about the time of year that I make lofty plans to make home-made tree ornaments, hand crafted cards, and generally get all Martha Stewarty. Relaxed, magical in the kitchen, a proper mummy to my children. This year will be different...

Then reality hits, and it's two days before Christmas, and you're wondering who the hell came up with the idea of Stockings for the Grown ups. Before you know it, you're purchasing something with 2 seconds of laugh appeal from Spencers. Something involving Homer Simpson and a beer bong. Dad'll love that.

In Britain, the national charity Oxfam have cannily tapped into this tendency to buy the ones we love something especially, especially trivial and stupid at Christmas. They have launched their campaign to Speak Out Against the Horror of Rubbish gifts. The t.v. commercial features famous-types like Helena Bonham-Carter, Helen Mirren and singer Will Young (you might not recognize the name on that one, but he's the lush young one near the beginning... link to the ad after the jump...)

Instead of lumbering your loved ones with unwanted kitchen gadgets and singing fish, this year you can go to Oxfam Unwrapped and choose from an alternative gift range, and buy fertiliser, a toilet, condoms, essential medicines and school books for communities in developing countries.


Considering the serious message underpinning the commerical, the whole campaign is delivered with real humour, with a satirical take on the typical fundraising commerical (Sally Struthers, anybody?)

While my family will be getting something under the tree this year other than a toilet or two, the campaign has made me seriously look at what I *do* chose to spend my money on--there's definitely room in the budget for some fertiliser and a bog, as long as I resist the jiving santa, that is...

Most Unbelievable Video I Have Ever Seen

I know it is eight minutes long, trust me...it is worth every single second. WATCH ALL OF IT

To Santa or Not?

Matt and I are in a discussion about whether or not we tell our kids about Santa Claus. I say discussion and I mean it. Neither of us are passionate in either direction, but we both have misgivings about indulging in the Santa fantasy as well as not comfortable with dispelling it either.

My suggestion is that we just don't make a "thing" out of it. If people talk to our kids about Santa, they can give the dumb, "I have no idea what language you are speaking" look to those adults. Or they can choose to go for it. But we won't perpetuate the myth or tell stories about being good and getting presents. I mean, basically our problem is not so much with Santa as the idea of flat-out lying to our kids about something that we just don't care about.

Both of our parents told us about Santa, but I don't think that my parents carried it very far. It might have just been a "theme" of the season as opposed to a real person. But, Matt said he was really devastated when he learned the truth about Santa and just doesn't want to do that to his kids. My feeling is, just don't look at it through the eyes of a jaded adult. But let it be what it is, fun. Don't make it into a big deal, but you simply play and have fun with the season. I mean, we can't make Christmas morning be the morning of dreams coming true simply because 1) we don't want to and 2) we can't afford to. By simply not indulging in that, you would think that the truth of Santa making all of your dream come true would come out eventually.
Of course, you can't control what your kids do or don't believe.

Last year, my friend gave her kids a new swing set for Christmas. She had EVERYONE she could think of go in on it. Of course, they spent the night at their grandparents house and the swing set was installed at the kids house. So on Christmas morning, they had nothing to open. Their mom told them, "You have an amazing present at home. Everyone went in on it and you will enjoy it all year long!"
Her son, Sam was seen pouting a short while later. My friend asked him what was wrong. He said, "I know what my present is and I don't want it! Cause it's LOVE and LOVE is boring!!!"

What are you thoughts on what we should do about Santa? Pros and Cons of the Santa story? Help us out!

Also, if you get a chance, please check out David Sedaris' Six to Eight Black Men story about Santa Claus. It will make you fall apart with laughter! Click here to listen

Shopping Cart Research

I have recounted my story of Lucy in the runaway shopping cart to many people in the last two weeks. I even went to the scene of the accident and spoke to a manager of the grocery store. He listened very politely, but basically said, "Tough." I wanted to look on the internet and see if there were ANY grocery carts that have brakes installed on them. The only ones I found have to do with preventing theft of carts, not as a safety feature.

Upon further research, I found several articles which site the American Association of Pediatrics recommending that children never be placed in grocery carts. Which is impossible! But their reasoning is that, many grocery stores don't maintain the straps and so many carts are suspect in their safety mechanism. I can totally attest to that! I mean, I can't tell you how many times I have been to a store and the strap is broken, torn off or the buckle doesn't work. They also say that the center of gravity on the cart makes them able to tip over without much work. Since a child is actually buckled in on the tipping point, that makes them extraordinarily dangerous. I have to admit, I have never thought of these issues before.

But a majority of the articles admonish parents to never let their kids stand up in the carts and recommends not shopping with them. Well, whoop-dee-do. Who wouldn't rather shop without their kids? You think that I love taking my child to a location where it is open season on what a bad mother I am because I can't control my kids? Or, I get stopped every aisle by a grandma who wants to play peekaboo? I would LOVE to just run in and run out. But that is not the luxury that I have these days.

What does a grocery store offer for me? Nothing except for a freak accident to occur. But it isn't so freakish. Over 24,000 kids are injured in shopping carts a year. 24,000.

So they suggest using a stroller, a backpack, bring a extra set of hands, or use the carts with a car in front. Wanna know how many "car carts" we have at our grocery store? Zero. More than that, they only have those double seat carts where Asher is afforded 3 1/2" of plastic to sit on and to be strapped into the cart by two suspender-type belts which he slips out of faster than I can buckle him in.

I think the only thing that I can do from now on, is force someone to unload my groceries while I deal with my kids. I just hate making the guy do that cause it is 12 degrees outside and I am not allowed to tip him.

I can't believe that this is not a bigger issue and that no one wants to make grocery carts more safe.

Best Part of the Weekend So Far?

The garbage men came a day late and picked up our 17 tons of garbage that was produced by Lucy's birthday.

That's not saying much for this week, I understand that. We have had a lovely time, but that garbage needed to go. We literally couldn't even shove a single DIAPER into the Herbie Curbie.

Thank you garbage men for working on a Saturday to pick up my kids poopy diapers.

Lucy's Birthday

Yesterday was Lucy's official birthday. We gave her a proper family breakfast birthday party and then spent the rest of the day not paying attention to it being her day. But tonight, we had a joint birthday party with Knox Troyer. His mom and I spent EVERY SINGLE DAY pregnant at the same time, except that Lucy evacuated my body two days early.

So we decided upon a joint party at our house tonight and after this past weekend's activities, it about killed me. I am so seriously tired right now, I can't believe it.


But it was really fun, we ended up having nine kids, 13 adults, four pizzas and a weiner dog all crammed into my living room, along with EVERY SINGLE TOY WE OWN on the floor.

I fed Lucy before everyone arrived because she is cranky when she is hungry and not getting fed. It turned out, she is also cranky when she is NOT HUNGRY and people keep giving her food like cake because she melted down and cried nearly the entire time the cupcake was on her tray. So we quickly moved on to presents.


She received some really cute books, along with a new winter hat and another doll baby. It was really fun to have so many people in our house, but when everyone left; I just sat on the couch for an hour.


So I made it. One year with two children. We have made it! I have loved this year, but I think that I have been in survival mode for most of it. I am just starting to come out of it and enjoy my kids more rather than just surviving them and their moods!

Those are tough words to right, but true. It is really hard when you have two kids who are just developmentally different to be in opposite places at all times. For example this week, Asher is getting potty training while Lucy is learning to walk. Can you get more diametrically opposed?

I am sure that those lines on the side of my eyes were not there this time last year. I dedicate those to Lucy, Asher and Slappy. Matt has his own...and is losing his hair. He doesn't need my help with that.
Anyway, we have made it through one year. Many more to come? I sure hope so!