To No In Particular

But if the shoe fits, wear it.

I want to be the first to let you know that HE is in fact not the one. He is not going to change. I have spent too much of my life waiting to see the person that I want to see him be and instead he has turned out to be the person that he is going to be. Is he finished changing? Not at all. But I have learned through the various seasons of life, including the lives of my children to find out that I can not make anyone (including myself) into the person that I want them to be.

All that I have to offer is the simple truth that God will hopefully, sometimes and even unsuccessfully help me to love the people that he puts into my life the way that they are. I also pray and hope that they can somehow love me, no matter how much I fail them. With that being said, just loving someone is not a true indicator of the fact that you should be with them the rest of your life or even the next five minutes. I have been through relationships that have lasted years (and shouldn't have) and first dates that I have been hopeful about that turn into nothing.

Stop spending time, energy and your heart on a relationship that you have not be able to make work. The first time around, work hard on it. The second time around, give it a good go. The third, fourth and fifth time should be confirmation that this is not going to work and it is time to move on.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. But since I have the benefit of having been in many relationships prior to my husband, I can tell you...even in marriage, relationships are difficult and this is a person that I have signed on to be with for the rest of my life. Dating should be fun, enjoyable and easy. Marriage is what's hard. If you can't have fun dating, then you will never have fun being married. I also have seen people who have a hard time dating; get married and my previous statement has been proven true more times than it has been false.

Go ahead and give yourself permission to close the door on this one. Not for me. Not for him. But for you. Every breakup is hard. You will always wonder about and maybe even still love a person. But, better relationships are out there. You don't have to blame him. You don't have to blame yourself. Sometimes, it just doesn't work out, even when two of the greatest people in the world find each other.

Thanks for listening. I hope that this will enable you to move on and find someone else. Cause girlfriend, this one's over.
Love and kisses. Tata,
Leslie

Anyone else out there ever needed this talking to? Cause I sure did. Thankfully, I did and I did move on. Now I have an incredible husband, children that I love and a life that I could never have dreamed of. And it's still hard to remain content! I can't imagine if I was with a person who made me consistently unhappy.

Overwhelmed and (almost) out of time

So we have a 9-day countdown until our house goes on the market and so now is when we decide that we are really serious about fixing the things on our house that have been around for oh, say, two years now. And well, it is a little too little too late. And it is irritating.

I am overwhelmed with work, house crap, the kids are both sick and cranky and so am I. Matt is behind and we are both feeling the pressure of the summer upon us. It really is no way to be.

On the plus side, while we were gone we hired Ben (the guy that lived with us last summer and fall) to come and clean our carpets while we were gone so that is one less thing on our to-do list.

So hopefully, before work week at Windy Gap we can tick a few more things off of our list and feel good about listing our house rather than hope that it looks just mildly better than the trailer park that is down the street.

*sigh*
But who wouldn't want to buy our house and get to sit on our front porch? Doesn't that look lovely?


Here are pictures from our beach trip up on Flickr right now. We are kind of regretting going since we have so many things going on. But it was nice to pretend like we don't have our lives here to catch up on. Just for you, another taste of our time there:

The Wal-Martization of My Family

Yesterday, I took both kids with me to Wal-Mart because I needed a ton of groceries and well...it is just cheaper there.

So, we loaded up early and arrived at the house of Doom. I decided to let Asher just run beside the cart because I needed to 1) Wear him out by making him walk and 2) I hate pushing the giant double cart around in the store.

So that was mistake #1. It all went well for about 10 minutes and then Asher started touching everything in the store and trying to put it in the cart. Anything he saw, he grabbed. So I had to nip that in the bud.

But he was excited and in a good mood, so we continued. He was being a really good "helper" for a good portion of our time. But around the 45 minute mark, things went steadily downhill as he started just grabbing things off the shelf and throwing them in the cart. Eventually this came to a head in the produce department where he grabbed a red delicious apple (which are NOT delicious and are instead mealy and gross) and took a big bite. Yep. You guessed it. I am about to become the Wal-Mart mom who beats her kid in public.

I don't. I take a deep breath and talk to him without opening my mouth through a clenched jaw. When I speak to him this way, it is my version of a warning shot. Usually, he perks up because he knows that the end is near.

It does not work however. I make him walk with me holding hands and he refuses. In fact, he just yells, "NO!" at me. Ah-ha. My sweet little boy yelling "no!" in the middle of the giant main aisle of Wal-Mart. So, I give him a pop on the bottom and insist on the hand holding. Again, he yells, "NO!" And, all of the bones in his body disappear as he drops to the ground.

At this point, I want to throw him into the Plus Sized department and wear him out. But, I noticed this desire and took another deep breath. I told him, "You have to hold hands or you are in time out." "NO!" Okay, Time-Out in the middle of Wal-Mart. Why not? I mean it is not like I have frozen food, milk, yogurt and cold cuts in my cart.

Twenty minutes later, we are STILL in timeout. At this point, Asher does this, "I have to go pee-pee." Through the snot and tears, I (being the great mom I am) tell him its too bad, unless he wants to hold hands. He throws himself FACEDOWN onto the ground and then a little bit of pee leaks out.

Guess who wins? The two and half year old wins. But now, I am in a dilemma. I have a cart full of groceries, along with my 17-month old daughter and my purse is at the bottom of the cart. How am I going to take all of this into the bathroom with me and obstinate child?

Since we had been in timeout for twenty minutes, we assembled quite a crowd of Wal-Mart employees who just wanted to watch the Death Match and I approached one of them. Mercifully, she said that she would watch Lucy while I take Asher to the bathroom. We return one minute later, checkout and get as far from there as quickly as I could.

Did I win? No. Did I lose? No. Because I did not get reported to the Department of Social Services. This time.